I dont live anywhere near you, but I do have a 2year old! I left my husband a year ago, baby had just turned 1!! It was'nt easy and it was only in May this year that I finally gave up on the idea of us repairing our marriage and getting back together!! I aslo have a 4yr old and 7yr old!!
I remember how hard it was when my friends were moaning about the terrible two's and gritting my teeth to stop myself from saying atleast you have somebody else to support you/take part of it, never mind somebody to talk to when they've gone to bed!!
I can honestly say that after realising that I had no choice and just had to get on with it, it got easier!!
I'm lucky enough (sarcasm there) to get my family telling me everything I need to do aswell, with which I either give sarcasm or tell them that I'm not and will do what I think is necessary!!
It's just a phase, and on my 3rd time round I know that they grow out of it!!
It is difficult trying to do things on your own, for me it's harder because I have to do what will suit and is safe for all 3! But you just have to learn and adapt.
It's scary when you first start doing things, especially meeting with people that you dont know. I was talking to a friend the other day about my fear of people coming to or in my house. She said that I need to get over it, as nothing in my house will get done (plumbing, etc). For the min, I cant let that happen, and will just have to find ways round it!!
As for finding yourself. You will see alot of threads on here about people realising that they had lost themselves (including me) and what a great thing it was to find it all again!!
Try looking for different things that you and your toddler can go to, to try and make new friends, they dont necessarily have to be single. Some of my friends have been single parents at some point, but are married now. But they have been some of the most understanding and supportive (not including those on here!
I can echo friends being busy/not joining in on things. I try to make plans in advance, as much as poss, but when plans change and your left for yet another night/day on your own, but I'm trying to broaden my circle of friends!!
The saying 'life goes on' could never be any more appropriate. Changing and adapting makes you a stronger person, certainly has me anyway! Altho I still have my off days, which throws people because they're used to seeing me be so strong!!But I'm only human!!
Well good luck in your new journey!!